Raise your hand if you would like someone, a partner, with whom to watch movies, grab dinner, talk, laugh and engage in adult activities! Most of us do not hesitate to shoot that hand right up. Me, I would even lift my small Poland Syndrome hand high and wave it. With each Tinder swipe, we risk a piece of our hearts. The best dates are always those from which you expect nothing except a nice conversation, a cocktail and a lovely dinner.
How do we move from the first date to a life partner? I believe that first date is crucial. It tells all. As an empath, I can actually feel someone’s energy. I may even get a glimpse of their past and see their heart. I know much more about a person before they know about me. This can be a problem. But you do not have to be an empath to make sound judgments about the critical first hours with Mr/Ms. Right Swipe.
Be sure you properly screen your dates prior to meeting them out. A few texts and phone calls should suffice. Do they have a job? Sense of humor? Where do they like to eat? Do they have kids? How long since the divorce? You get the picture. Then quickly make plans to meet for dinner or drinks, whatever you both like. I love a man who can say, “hey, I made reservations at ____________ for 7 pm. Yay, a guy with a backbone and knows what he likes. (They are out there!)
You have the ability to arm yourself against time, money and emotions wasted if you tune into date #1. Unfortunately, first impressions last the longest. How does your date appear? Does he or she look neat, clean, unkempt. I love a guy in a Robert Graham shirt and jeans. If they care about themselves, they will care about you. Watch how you are greeted. I like a hug. Does he have your drink waiting for you? He knows because he asked or you told him.
All these are important, however, the next few items are they key to whether you want to see your Bumble Bee again. Judge the conversation in two ways, content and energy. Here’s what I mean: Does the chatting flow naturally like you have known each other in a previous life? Are there connections that could not possibly been known? While he is talking do you want to plant one right on him, even if you hold back? If you want to kiss your date in the first ten minutes, you have chemistry. If the conversation never seems to end in awkward silence, you have a deeper connection.
The last feeling you should have is timelessness. Are you having so much fun, laughing talking, cheering on your favorite team at a local bar? Does he sneak that kiss in when you didn’t expect it? Then maybe, you just didn’t want it to end because it was so much fun that you grabbed an Uber and headed to a late night spot you both love, like Kowloon, for a nightcap, pupu platter and realized this was one more thing you had in common.
If all the above happens on your first date, don’t let them go. They are worth keeping in your life. Maybe I am presumptuous to think there are not red flags. There very well maybe, but this is worth a shot. It’s the best first date evaah!
Have you had the best first date? I would love to hear about it.
Tell me what’s going on in your life. I want to hear from you.
Wishing you love, balance & peace.
Amore & Baci,